Accepting ourselves, accepting the truth and what is true for us are all ways in which we can honour ourselves. Honouring ourselves is a huge part of living the life we desire. We cannot honour others if we don't honour ourselves. So how do we go about it?
Here are 6 ways we can honour ourselves:
1. Making independent choices
We have the choice to think and many times we fail to acknowledge this because we weren’t given many opportunities to tap into making choices.
Being in a position where we make choices boosts our view of self and it helps us learn how to take responsibility for our choices.
We may not have been given enough room to make our own choices or shamed for making the wrong choices in the past but with practice and a reminder that we are human and are bound to make mistakes, we can make bold decisions that are not influenced by what others think we should do.
2. Authenticity
Your gifts are needed in this world and the truth is no one else can share them but you. In order to be more authentic, we have to let go of the fear of being seen. We deserve consideration for the things we are so good at. If we focus on just being ourselves and going back to the things that got us excited, then we are honouring ourselves. We are allowing ourselves to grow.
We are more free, positive and creative when we are not pretending to be someone else or pretending to like what the next person likes.
I know being authentic in a world that needs us to show up in specific ways can be hard but we have to take the risk and be rebellious with the truth about who we are. Some of the small things we can do include ordering food that we actually like, being around people that we want to spend time with, trying out things we always wanted to and speaking up for ourselves.
3. Accepting our right to feel and express our feelings
When we allow ourselves to feel, desire, need, want, suffer from, get angered or get frightened is to honour our feelings. Society might trick us into wearing masks or numbing our feelings but at the root of things, we were made to feel.
The truth is that we are respecting ourselves by allowing ourselves to experience emotions. Some come as a result of the things we do and some from outside of us. They are all important. They make us more compassionate, understanding and creative. We also see how connections can be built from experiencing certain emotions at the same time.
An important note that I always share is that we are not our feelings, we experience them. Our feelings do not define us. We decide how to experience these feelings and what to do to either intensify the emotions or get rid of it. That is all in our control. How we do it will show how much respect we have for ourselves and those around us.
In honoring ourselves, we let our feelings indicate what we like and dislike, we get motivated and we get clues on our wants and desires.
There’s no guarantee that we will act right with all our feelings. Some are overwhelming and take time to process and it is through honouring ourselves that we give ourselves time to heal from the negative feelings and grace to keep working on how to responsibly respond to emotions that are uncomfortable. One thing that is certain is that being denial or repressing our feelings is a sign that we are not honouring ourselves. Let’s choose wisely.
4. Through growth
If we are sticking to the old ways of doing things, we are not honouring ourselves. We are limiting ourselves. Staying stuck in how things have always been done may feel familiar or even comfortable but we are capable of so much more. Our minds and bodies are so powerful and by pushing ourselves to learn new skills, by getting more active and by changing our limiting mindsets and beliefs; we are truly honouring ourselves and improving the quality of our life experience.
5. Accepting ourselves
We have to be okay with ourselves in order to get to a place where we are not living in the past. There will be times when we will be called to change the things in our control and that will require a lot of self- acceptance. We will have to see the parts of ourselves that we don’t show often and the work will be hard.
Accepting ourselves means that we see that we are human. Accepting ourselves means we accept that we are constantly changing and so are our needs. Accepting ourselves means we are going to prepare for change and we are going to go through it and give ourselves grace. Once we have accepted these few truths, then we make it easier to work on what we can change.
6. Honouring others
We are capable of seeing what work we are doing by examining how we show up in the world. If we fail to honour ourselves, there is no way we will honour others. We might pretend to do so but if we are not accepting ourselves, if we are ignoring our feelings, if we are not growing as individuals, if we are not trusting ourselves to make choices and if we are not being ourselves at all times then there is no way we will appreciate these qualities in others.
In the same way, if we honour other people’s needs and wants, it gets clearer why we should also inspire ourselves to get clear on what our own needs and wants are.
Some of the ways we honour others include respecting their choices, accepting them as they are, giving them understanding and allowing them to have opinions regardless of whether they are in line with ours.
Here’s to doing more honouring of ourselves!
Love, Sabali