Hi beautiful,
You now refer to yourself as Sabali which means Patience. I am so happy to tell you that you are about to turn 26 in 2019. You have so many good years ahead of you. 2019 is a good year for you and you are trying as much as possible to grow into a more purposeful and centred young woman. You are trying to live your life as if there is no tomorrow because life has shown you that tomorrow is not guaranteed. You are also strong enough to admit that the journey of life is not easy but you push through regardless.
Family
You are blessed with a strong family and you have so many relatives. You will live with some of them and although you do not know why it will be good for you to hang around children your age as your parents settle an amicable separation.
You will be strong enough to go through some trauma growing up. It will make you considerate of other people’s struggles. You will learn that you are not the only one going through tough times as you grow. Dad will not be around for long. It is probably for the best that he will leave but this will not take away from all the anger you will bottle up inside because you will not understand why the two people you look up to the most cannot work things out peacefully. As you grow up you will learn to forgive him and he will come back into your life as he always has a spot in your heart.
In the next few years, you will learn that family is an ever-changing concept for you. You will go from thinking you are an only child to realizing that you have 6 siblings. You have twin brothers who you have not yet met in person at 26 but communicate once in a while. You will learn that they are all different and unique souls. You will grow closer to them and they will love you as well. You will meet Chris and receive such homely hugs from him. He will be your friend and you will grow together, learn from each other and be neighbours. He will teach you how easy it is to make friends when you have an open heart and his generosity will rub off on you. You will meet Ngure, dad will make it a memorable meet..through a phone call. He will ask you to scroll to his number and ring him. He will sound excited for someone who hasn’t met you yet and he will come to school to visit you and you will feel loved and cared for. He will bring laughs and always keep in touch with you. It will hurt so bad when he rests and you are still dealing with losing him so soon.
You will get a new mum. She will be one of the greatest souls you have ever met. She is soulful, selfless, stylish like your other mum and caring. You will be introduced to a family of revolutionary men who will somehow awaken your spirit.
Nakuru will be your hometown. How cool is that? You will go there one weekend, fall in love with the place and feel so welcomed that it becomes your favourite place to be.
Your family will be there through thick and thin and this relationship will get tried as you deal with grief but they will always be there for you.
Career
You are now an Advocate waiting to be admitted to the bar! You did it, Tracy! This has always been your dream even when you had no clue what it meant to be a lawyer and the hard work it took to be done. You are doing amazing so keep up the good work! It will pay.
You will get to go to school with your favourite cousin Leila. You will grow together and help each other. She really is your forever person.
You are currently looking for a job which will offer a healthy work environment and good pay although the big plan is to save enough to invest in something of your own.
Love
You will learn how to love yourself slowly. It will be hard because as a child, you got compared to people your age a lot. You will battle a lot of self-image issues and you will have to put in work to feel good about yourself.
You will learn how to create a healthy relationship with food. I know comfort food is helping you cope with all you have seen and experienced but you will learn how to regain a healthy relationship with food.
Loving yourself will be an intentional journey you take on in 2018. You will do your research and even start your own blog ‘Wellness with Sabali’. People will love n support you through this wellness journey and it will inspire you to do even more.
You will fall in love and lust over the years. This will come with highs and lows. You will fall into toxic relationships but you will grow and do better. You will find a soul that matches yours although it will be hard for you not to want to know whether it will last. You will learn to be in the present more and let your guard down for the right person. You will learn to love yourself more through other eyes.
You will lose friends who you love and thought would be there forever. It will hurt. At first, you will blame them but with time, you will recognize that both parties to the friendships were at fault and you will have to take accountability for your actions. You will have to apologise for not being patient and not communicating like a grown lady and learn that distancing yourself does not solve anything. It will be a freeing experience. and you will learn to be open to new friendships.
You will make so many like-minded friends who will help you grow and share laughs and memories with.
Healing
Healing will not be linear for you. It will come in waves. You will have to be vulnerable and surrender so as to heal. You are still working on your healing and part of it is being occupied so as to silence the sad thoughts in your head. Finding purpose will be instrumental in your healing. You will find your voice as you grow as well as your need to grow spiritually.
Writing will be an opportunity for you to learn how to feel free and explore so many things. You will start a wellness blog as I stated earlier and it will give you a sense of purpose.
Music will heal you as well. You will love conscious music and it will not only open your eyes to reality but also help you find peace because you are not going through it alone. Reggae will calm your soul and you will enjoy some amazing albums such as Revelation and Distant Relatives.
You will also interact with music because you are a founder of a Record Label. Carbon Shades Entertainment will help you nurture your love for music and you will learn the business aspect to music which will help you make sound decisions in other aspects of your life. You will make music and learn to be more confident and this will show.
There’s so much beauty in life. Be happy and remember to be yourself always. I love you and you matter.
Love,
Sabali
